 is for Vision
My vision for the future is in major transition. In fact I think it would be very cool if I could “receive” a vision of my future, my life, my anything, just to give me a hint to know which way I should go. I believe it's important to have a general hope for the future, a loose road-map for life, buy my problem has typically been setting those expectations of how it should go and being far too attached to the outcome. Most of the time the attachment to “my way” and the expectation of “should be” has led to deep disappointment in myself and my fellow man. So much so that I am now setting a course for a future that I am drawing a complete blank about. I have my priorities: food, shelter, health, safe child, healthy pets, happy home, and comfy clothes (big unattractive pajama pants that make my butt look huge are the norm) but I have let go of my previous visions for my future. Nothing turned out as expected which is not a crime, it really isn’t even horrible, I am the happiest I’ve been in years, so my lack of precise vision isn’t troubling me too much. The pajama pants may be just a little, but not my lack of vision. I think perhaps the best way for me to express what my true vision for the future has become is to be happy. Be happy—that’s it. I have learned that I am completely capable of doing many jobs, leading many people, organizing many projects, and solving many problems. I've done this in very different settings over the past 30 years and what matters most to me is the happiness I bring with me while doing these things. It's the people and the fun I remember from all those years, not the list of accomplishments or accolades. In the process of losing my compass and the panic that followed I've had some seriously shitty days but laughter has finally returned to my world along with an appreciation of the smallest of things. Worry has subsided and my all time constant companion called Fear has been shown the door. Yes there are still moments of worry and fear but I am much better these days at holding an accurate view of what’s realistic worry/fear and what’s totally over the top outta my mind stupid worry/fear. This is a major achievement for me and my life, and I attribute it to my new and improved vision for my life—happiness.
8 Comments
4/25/2014 10:16:35 am
So true! It is a journey and most of all a choice, and I admit to struggling with that concept of just choosing to be happy. I am on my way to making that a permanent piece of "me" and it really does help. 4/25/2014 12:25:08 am
Well being happy is what counts at the end of a lifetime.What makes us happy and keeps us in that state is what we need to have a vision of...and sometimes it just helps to be happy without any reason :) 4/25/2014 10:18:10 am
You're welcome! It's a fun site!! Thanks for visiting and you're right, I need to accept that having no reason at all is "good enough" 4/25/2014 03:44:35 am
I appreciate the candor and vulnerability you expressed in this post. I found it very touching. You also made me think about how I had envisioned my future when I was younger and how my life has turned out. I feel fortunate that there is evidence of what my vision suggested and where I am today. 4/25/2014 10:20:15 am
Thank you for your comment. I am so glad you visited! It is nice to see the pieces of the "wishes that came true." You are fortunate! That makes me happy that you found that today. 4/25/2014 06:35:03 am
Happiness, Love and Family are, for me, the trinity of personal goals. If I contribute these three things to others and get to enjoy them myself then, I have to state that my life is turning out fairly well. Meeting you has made me happy, too, Conlee. :) 4/25/2014 10:22:58 am
It's like reading a comment from an old friend Tom. I am so glad that my first experience with the whole atoz thing has led me to people like you. It is great to find fun reads! I do like your list of personal goals and I have to say that whether I planned it or not my life has boiled down to the same things...thankfully. Leave a Reply. |
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