R is for Respect by Conlee Ricketts #atozchallenge

is for Respect

One of the three definitions of respect in the Concise Oxford English Dictionary is “due regard for the feelings or rights of others.” This is the respect I am offering today.

The primary definition (if they are written in a hierarchy) typically focuses on an admiration based a person’s qualities or achievements, but this is not where I place my attention today because I think I might neglect many people and things if I waited for them to impress me with a particular quality or achievement.

In fact I prefer to extend respect to others regardless of whether or not I agree with them, like them, or even know anything about them.  The feelings and rights of others…a person’s right to maintain an opinion contradictory to my own…I respect that.  I respect a person willing to disagree with me politely.  I don’t like confrontation; I enjoy civil discourse; I love a good debate; what I don’t love is another person’s refusal to let me speak my piece.  I will, however, respect the fact that they have different feelings, opinions, behaviors, or social protocol than I and then will then remove myself from the unpleasant interaction.

Because I respect you never means I need to continue to interact with you if I am no longer enjoying the interaction.  Disagreeing with you doesn’t imply a lack of respect.  Any behavior toward you that is mean, hurtful, malicious, or spiteful would demonstrate a lack of respect for your existence, and this is the kind of behavior I avoid because it literally causes me physical pain to witness these types of interactions. 

Lately I’ve had many interactions that feel either confrontational to me or that feel as if I have been completely disregarded as being present in the room or conversation.  I’m not a big fan of these feelings, but I realize they have something to teach me about how I interact with others.  I will work on paying deep attention to others in order to feel less ignored, and I will work on listening intently to others in order to help myself feel heard. 

I firmly believe “you get what you give” so I offer up my respect for the day to all the people, places, plants, and animals that I encounter.  You deserve it.

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